Then I Did
by PolkadotSunstar
Summary: Freddy came back to town in search of Zack. He's afraid that Zack won't want anything to do with him anymore. Freddy needs Zack in his life and he regrets ever going away. When Freddy and Zack finally meet up, what will happen? Slash! Freddy/Zack. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: I haven't written in a while and I'm stuck on my other stories so I thought I'd start a new one while I had a little time on my hands. I can't say yet, if I've given up on my other fics, because I'm not sure right now. I don't feel that they are very good and they don't seem to be **_**going**_** anywhere, I'll let you guys know if anything else will be updated.**

**Now, for this new fic, it will most likely be a few chapters. The pairing will be Zack/Freddy. We'll, see where it goes. :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own School of Rock or anything related. I don't own the song 'Then I Did' either, it belongs to Rascal Flatts.**

**Warnings: Slash, probably a bit of language and angst as well. Nothing graphic.**

**----------**

_I thought about calling you when I got off the plane  
Every time I see this city through the clouds I get that way  
Call me crazy, for missing you like this but I do_

I miss you Zack. It's been so long since I've seen you last, or heard your voice. _What am I even doing here?_

You know what's weird? I've never been able to call this place a home. But that's what it's always been. And you made it that way, Zack, _you_ made it that way. When we were growing up, you were all I had, and then I left, and now I miss you. I don't have anything anymore. You're probably getting along just fine without me though, you're the one who convinced me to leave.

It was always easier for you, Zack. Everyone liked you. You were nice, and you were quiet. You were the smart one, the cute one, the shy one. I was just the bad boy that people liked because of who I pretended to be, they thought I was trouble, they thought I was no good, they thought I was cool. No one liked me for who I really was, no one that is, except for you. People called you crazy, for hanging out with someone like me, but I needed you, and at the time, I think you might've needed me. But not anymore, Zack. I'm sure you've moved on with your life. And that's what hurts, Zack, that's what hurts me the most.

----------

**Author's Note: Well, how was it? I hope you all enjoyed it. I'll update soon, maybe later on tonight or tomorrow if I get the chance. Future chapters will most likely be longer. Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: Thanks so much for the reviews! Here's chapter two, I hope you all like it! For some reason the song lyrics in the beginning and end of the chapter won't italicize, and I've tried fixing it, but it won't work, sorry!  
**

**Disclaimer: I don't own School of Rock or anything related.**

**Warning: Slash, possibly some language, and angst. Nothing graphic.**

----------

By now I figured you had all your numbers changed  
It's been at least a year since I called you up to say  
We need to talk, I got this job and I think I'm going to take it

It's been a year Zack, and here I am, standing in front of what used to be your house, the place that was always like a second home to me. How was it that a place that caused you so much pain was a place that I could call home? Living here hurt you, Zack, and I know that, but it was the only place where I was always welcome and where I knew that I would be loved. You hated it here but it always seemed like everything was okay when I stayed here with you, when your father wasn't around to beat and your mother wasn't there to insult you. Those were the good days, the days that I remember most. The days that I _miss_ the most, Zack.

I know you aren't here, why would you still be living here if you actually had the chance to break free and live your own life? But I need to find you, Zack, and if I have to do it through your parents then I will. I need to see you at least one last time, Zack, even if all I get to do is look.

Why did I take that job Zack? Why did you let me move away and take that job? It wasn't what I thought it would be, it wasn't what I wanted. I miss you, Zack, I _need_ you. You never knew how I felt. You never knew that I loved you. You always asked me why I didn't date, and I always said I just wasn't interested. You were why. I knew I couldn't have you, but I kept hoping that someday, someday I could at least tell you what you meant to me, just so you knew. When you let me leave, Zack, let me slip away, I gave up all hope, I knew you didn't love me, and knew you never would. I thought these feelings would finally go away, but I was wrong. I was so wrong.

Your parents weren't home, but I haven't given up hope yet Zack. I'll find you, and I'll hold you in my arms before I let you go for good.

You're a teacher, Zack; I never expected that of you. I always thought you'd be famous someday, I always thought you'd really make something of yourself. But, I bet you make a good teacher, I bet your students have crushes on you, I bet everyone loves you just as much as they always have. I bet you've forgotten all about me, Zack, and what we used to have.

We had the kind of friendship that people would kill for. Where we were two guys, but we weren't afraid to cry in front of each other and show fear and pain, we weren't afraid to hug each other and comfort each other when things got bad. We weren't afraid to be who we really were around each other, just a couple of lost kids, not really knowing what to do, not really having a direction in life. All we had were dreams, Zack, and you know what? I know why they call them dreams, because they will _never_ be a reality.

I wasn't meant to fulfill my dreams and become an artist, I wasn't meant to be with you, Zack, as anything more then a friend, and, you know what Zack? I wasn't meant to miss you this much.

Cause I been waiting all my life  
For a break like this  
It's my chance of a lifetime I just know it is  
I gotta go find these dreams  
Was the last thing that I said  
And then I did

----------

**Author's Note: I hope you guys all liked it! Please review and tell me what you thought! I'll update as soon as possible.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note: Thanks so much for the reviews, I'm glad there are a few of you liking this so far.**

**Warning: Slash, not really anything at the moment. Probably some language in the future, but nothing too terrible.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own School of Rock or the song Then I Did, Rascal Flatts owns that.**

----------

_I can see clear to the mountains as I head up our old street  
I remember how we'd call in sick on days like these  
And turn the music up roll the windows down and just drive_

I remember high school so well, Zack. You and I were always together, it was always fun when I was with you. Sometimes when it was a really nice day, and we didn't want to go to school we wouldn't, we'd just call in sick and you and I would go for a ride in my car. We would even skip band practice, just so we could be together, the two of us, without anyone to bother us or make us be something we aren't.

_You talked me outta givin' up on myself so many times  
Convinced me to get in while I could, regrets hang heavy on the mind  
But you never doubted me you kept pushing me_

We would drive around all day, sometimes without talking, but sometimes we just couldn't stop talking. We'd talk about anything, and whenever I was down, you knew what to say. Do you have any idea how much you've always meant to me? You always pushed me to do the right thing and be the best I could be, regardless of what other thought. You were really the only one who cared about what happened to me.

Sometimes I wish we could go back in time, back to when we were young and innocent in high school, and then maybe after college I wouldn't have let you convince me to take that job. Deep down I knew I didn't want it, I knew nothing good would come from it, but I took it, Zack, because_you _wanted me too. Back then; I would've done anything for you.

_Saying you've been waiting all your life for a break like this  
It's your chance of a lifetime you just know it is  
You gotta go find those dreams  
Was the last thing that you said  
And then I did_

I think that was really the only thing I regret, Zack. I shouldn't have gone away from you. You were the only thing I had, and I know it's been a year since we've seen each other, but maybe you still have a place in your heart for me. I'll find you, Zack, and when I do, I'll tell you how I feel. You may never want to see me again, or maybe you'll just let it go and find it in your heart to be my friend again. I miss you, Zack.

_But you were wrong  
Love was what I wanted all along  
And now you're gone_

_I thought about calling you when I got off the plane  
Every time I see this city through the clouds I get that way_

_But you were wrong  
Love was what I wanted all along_

----------

**Author's Note: I hope you guys liked chapter three.**

**Pretty much, in the next chapter Freddy will find Zack and the story will really get going. There won't be any song lyrics in the next few chapters but I may add in another song later on, I'm not sure yet.**

**I'll try to make the next chapter a little longer, I'm sorry this was so short.**

**Please review and tell me what you thought:)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note: I'm so sorry for the wait, Midterms are this week and I've been swamped lately with homework and practices and it's been a bit overwhelming. I really hope you guys enjoy this chapter though. :)**

**Warning: Contains Slash and probably a little bit of language, nothing too bad though, and nothing too graphic.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything, don't sue me.**

----------

I can't help but question myself sometimes, question my feelings. What if it isn't love that I feel for you, Zack? Maybe I'm just desperately trying to hold on to the past and the closeness we once had. Maybe I'm in love with what we used to have and what we could've been. Maybe I'm not in love with you Zack, but maybe it doesn't matter, maybe I am in love with our past and what could've been our future, but _maybe it doesn't matter._

I've felt this way about you for as long as I can remember, Zack, and to me, it can only be described as love. But maybe it was just trust and understanding and so much more, everything we had once, something that can't even take words.

Even at times like these, when I'm unsure of my feelings and I'm questioning myself about life, it all comes back to you, Zack, and me wanting to find you, needing you back in my life—and suddenly, nothing else matters.

Nothing else has ever mattered.

It feels so unreal when I have you, Zack. I feel unreal, but so alive at the same time.

You can make the world disappear. But, I realize, you _are_ my world.

----------

I looked you up Zack. I can't believe you work back at Horace Green, a place we always hated when we went there as teens, but I cant believe I didn't think to look here first. I'm planning on meeting you when you leave this afternoon after class. I can only hope that you'll be happy to see me.

----------

I waited outside of the school for an hour after the students were let out at 2:30 until I finally saw you walking down the walk way. I stood and you looked up at me through your chestnut locks. I saw you grin and at first I was shocked that you seemed happy to see me, but soon I was smiling back and you had me in a bone-crushing embrace. I felt your tears soaking through my shirt and I felt myself breathing in your scent and desperately clutching to you, never wanting to let you go. I spoke unconsciously, involuntarily.

"I love you, Zack."

----------

**Author's Note: There you go. I'm really sorry that this is so short, I can't make any promises, but I hope to make the next chapter a bit longer. I hope you all liked it and please review, I'll update as soon as possible. :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note: I'm sorry for the wait! Thank you so much for the reviews, I'm glad you guys are liking this so far.**

**My other stories are on hiatus right now so the only thing I'm updating at the moment is this, and if I start a new story. Please bear with me, everyone!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything School of Rock related and Rascal Flatts owns the song from the first few chapters. Don't sue me. :)**

**Warning: Slash, language, Angst. You have been warned.**

**I hope you all enjoy Chapter 5!**

----------

You pushed me away and gave me a frightened look before you turned and ran away.

I ruined it. I ruined everything. I didn't mean to. _I didn't._ You hate me now Zack, I know you do. I'm so sorry.

A single tear ran down my face and as you turned to take one last look at me, I brushed it away and turned to walk away. Out of your life for good.

Why did I even come back here, Zack? I knew that this would happen. I knew you wouldn't feel the same way.

If I hadn't said anything.

If I had kept my mouth shut.

If I had held onto you for just a moment longer.

If I had only let you do the talking.

_If only._

Maybe you'd still be here.

Maybe everything would've been okay.

_Maybe._

But it's not. And it never will be, Zack. There's not left but to leave you to your life and for me to go away forever. You don't want me and I know that now. I might as well just go away.

Maybe life isn't even worth living anymore.

----------

**Author's Note: I am so sorry that this chapter was so short but the next one should be out soon and will hopefully be a bit longer.**

**Please review and tell me what you thought!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: Thank you guys so much for the reviews, I'm really glad you're all liking this so far.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Don't sue me.**

**Warning: Slash, language, angst—the usual.**

----------

I don't know why, but I found myself walking towards my parents' house and before I knew it I was knocking gently on the door of a house that was once so familiar to me. I heard Scruffy bark and smiled remembering my childhood friend, the only one besides Zack and my mom that I ever really had.

About a minute later a tired looking women came to the door, and a fluffy white dog pounced on me, it took a second but once my mom recognized me she pulled me into hug, shooed Scruffy away, and ushered me inside with tears in her eyes.

"Freddy, honey! How are you? I've missed you so much!"

I smiled softly at the worn-out women, "Hi mom. I've been… good. I'm sorry I haven't called in a while—I missed you too."

"Honey, what's wrong? Talk to me."

I sighed, "I went to see Zack today. I missed him so much…" I took a shuddering breath and choked out, "mom—he doesn't want me anymore! I don't know what to do! I need Zack—_I need him so much."_

"Freddy, I know you love Zack… I've always known. You two are meant for each other, sweetie. Don't believe for one second he doesn't want you and need you just the same as you. There's no doubt in my mind that, that boy doesn't love you."

"But mom! …He just turned around and walked away. Out of my life," I shook my head, "He doesn't want me mom."

"Honey, maybe he was just scared. He's been without you for a long time now Freddy, and its been hard on him, maybe he was just getting used to the idea of having to live without you and you just showed up, without warning. Maybe he's just scared honey, he doesn't want to lose you again, Freddy."

"But, mom, what should I do? I'd do anything for Zack… I _need_ him."

"Just give Zack some time Freddy—that's all he needs. Just a little time to think things over. All you can do now is be here for him when he's ready to talk. Just don't go running away from it all now, Freddy—not when Zack needs you."

I smiled at my mom and managed to swallow down my tears. Maybe she's right, maybe all Zack needs is time. And for Zack, I have all the time in the world.

----------

It's been two days. I haven't quite given up hope yet that Zack will come and talk to me, but I'm starting to believe it won't happen. If it wasn't for my mom, I probably wouldn't be here any more.

It's been weird being back in my home and back in this neighborhood without the band and without Zack. The days just drag by and there isn't anything to do. My mom's been good company though, and she's always finding some chore around the house for me to do. She has yet to give up any hope that Zack will come.

----------

It's been four days.

Zack finally came.

----------

The doorbell rang and I put down the towel I was folding to go answer it. I opened the door and was shocked to find Zack standing on my doorstep.

He smiled weakly, his eyes were troubled and my heart went out to him. I gestured for him to come in. I led Zack to the family room and I sat down on the sofa, moving the laundry basket aside. I was surprised when Zack chose to sit next to me.

Zack fidgeted nervously and looked down at his lap.

"Zack…?"

Zack helplessly looked up at me, reminded me somewhat of a lost puppy, he had tears sparkling in his beautiful eyes, threatening to spill out at any second.

"Zack…" I said again, not really knowing what to do, or what to say.

I took a chance and pulled Zack into a sweet embrace and I felt his tears falling, soaking through my t-shirt. It felt so right to have Zack in my arms. This is the way it should be. Always.

Zack pulled away hesitantly and wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his sweatshirt.

"Freddy… I really don't know what to say—how to say this. I—I missed you so much. I'm so glad you're back; I didn't think I would ever see you again. I regretted telling you to take that job from the start; I wasn't sure how I was supposed to make it without you.

It was so hard, Freddy, but I gradually began to pick my life up again and the other day—that was the happiest day of my life. Seeing you again, it brought back so much. I don't think I ever realized how much I craved your touch, your scent, your eyes, your…_everything. _Freddy, I didn't mean to push you away. Its just, I need you in my life and—and I cant lose you again."

"Zack. I only took that job because of you, you're opinion was the only one that mattered to me. If you had told me to stay I would've, no questions asked. I missed you so much, every day. I just couldn't take it anymore. I quit Zack. I needed you more then I needed some stupid job. I love you so much Zack, it makes my heart hurt to the point where I think I'm going to explode. You're the air I need in order to breathe. I need you in my life too Zack, and there is no way you're getting rid of me this time."

Zack smiled at me and a single tear rolled down his cheek. I brushed the tear away with my thumb and I tucked a lose strand of Zack's chestnut locks behind his ear.

"Zack?" I whispered, "Can I—can I kiss you?"

Zack swallowed hard and I saw tears glistening beyond his eyelashes. He nodded.

I put my hand at the base of Zack's neck, supporting his head and I used my other hand to gently cup the side of Zack's face. Zack slowly wrapped one arm around my waist and tangled the other into my messy blonde hair. I slowly leaned forward to capture his lips with mine in a kiss so captivating that it seemed like the whole world stopped, if only for a moment.

----------

**Author's Note- Aww, that was so fun to write. :) I hope you were all satisfied with that chapter, and I made it longer for you all. I'll try to update as soon as possible. Please review!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note: Thank you guys so much for the reviews! I'm so glad you like this so far.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything, don't sue me.**

**Warning: This story contains slash, abuse, and a little bit of language.**

----------

I broke off our kiss and leaned my forehead against Zack's for a moment before pulling away slightly. Zack entwined his fingers with mine and leaned his head on my shoulder.

"Freddy—I think I'm in love with you."

I smiled at Zack and brought our interlocked fingers to my mouth kissing his palm sweetly. I looked up at him through my eyelashes and caressed his cheek soothingly, "I think I'm in love with you too, Zack."

Zack smiled softly and leaned into me more, closing his eyes. I pressed a light kiss to each of his eyelids and leaned my head against Zack's slightly.

"So, where does this leave us Freddy? I mean… will you stay… with me?"

I smiled and glanced down at Zack, "I love you and as long as you love me too… I'm staying."

Zack grinned and raised his head from my shoulder. He wrapped his arms around my neck and I lifted him gently into my lap, resting my hands on his hips, my thumbs lovingly stroking the soft patch of skin exposed where his sweatshirt rode up slightly. I looked deeply into Zack's eyes and I smiled at him.

"Hey Spazzy?"

I smiled at the use of my old nickname, "yeah, Zack?"

"Uhm, well, there's…someone I want you to meet… will you come to my apartment with me?"

I nodded and Zack tugged me forward until I was pulled into a tender kiss.

I soon felt Zack sucking softly on my lower lip and I allowed him entrance into my mouth only to have his tongue playfully begin to duel with mine.

We broke apart for air and Zack caressed my cheek affectionately before once more grabbing my hand and tugging me up from the sofa.

I followed Zack out the door and got into his car. As we got closer to Zack's apartment I began to wonder who he could possibly want me to meet.

I didn't really dwell on it for too long though. I was just happy that my life was finally complete. It doesn't feel as if a huge part of me is missing anymore.

What I have now—it's a good feeling.

The ride to his apartment was short, only taking about five minutes. We arrived and Zack appeared to be stalling as he parked his car and just sat there for a moment. After a minute Zack slowly climbed out of the Buick which I took as a sign to do so as well.

I walked around the car and Zack peered up at me shyly, holding out his hand. I smiled and kissed his forehead lacing our fingers together—a perfect fit.

----------

**Author's Note: That was short one, I apologize. I hope you all enjoyed chapter seven anyway. Please review and I'll try to update as soon as possible!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note: Thank you guys so much for the reviews! This chapters longer for you guys, and I hope you like it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own School of Rock or the song that was used in the first few chapters, 'Then I Did' by Rascal Flatts. Don't sue me.**

**Warning: Contains slash, angst, and language. You have been warned.**

**Enjoy chapter eight!**

----------

Zack unlocked the door to his apartment and I followed him inside.

"Mom?"

I looked at Zack, confused, "Zack, I already know your mom…"

"I know Freddy… that's not who I want you to meet."

"Zack, honey is that you?"

Zack smiled and he motioned for me to follow him into the kitchen, "Yeah mom, I'm home."

Mrs. Mooneyham put away the plate she had been cleaning and turned to smile at us.

"Freddy! It's been so long! How've you been, sweetie?"

I grinned, "hey Mrs. Mooneyham. I've been good, and you?"

"Oh, fine, fine. Well… I should be heading home. I'll talk to you later, Zack. Freddy, it was nice to see you."

I ducked my head, "it was nice to see you too, Mrs. Mooneyham."

Zack turned to me, "Freddy, you can make yourself comfortable. Mom, I'll walk you out."

A few minutes later Zack walked back in holding the hands of a little girl and a little boy.

"Freddy? This is Mike and Amanda. They're twins—five years old. It's a long story… but I adopted them about a year ago, after I finished college. My mom watches them everyday when they get home from school."

I can't say that I'm not shocked, because I am, there's really no other way to put it, but it's not a bad thing. I just wasn't expecting to come home to find Zack tied down with such young kids.

"Freddy? Please say something."

I looked up at Zack and saw tears sparkling in his eyes.

"Zack, I love you—all of you, and all of your baggage. That's never going to change." I smiled down at the kids, "Hey Mike, Amanda. I'm Freddy."

"Freddy's a friend of mine. You guys go play while I talk to Freddy for a little while, okay?"

Mike grinned and nodded before grabbing Amanda's hand and pulling her along with him as he darted out of the room.

I smiled, "They're cute. Mike seems energetic."

Zack looked away, "Yeah he is… they're great kids. I love them so much…"

"Zack… c'mere. Are you okay?"

He grabbed my hand and led me into the family room. He sat and pulled me down with him.

"I—I'm just so happy that you accepted everything. I didn't want you to leave me."

"I'm never going to leave you, Zack."

Zack kissed me sweetly and I tasted his salty bittersweet tears as they fell and landed on our joint lips.

I pulled away after a moment and cupped Zack's face in my hands, brushing my lips over the traces of tears on his cheeks.

"You said it was a long story—how Mike and Amanda became your kids. Can you tell me? What happened to them—their parents?"

Zack sighed and leaned into me, a few tears spilling out of his eyes.

"It was my dad. I guess while I was away at college he didn't have anyone to beat. My mom didn't tell me, but he had started to beat her, and badly. Whenever I was home for breaks my dad would beat me until I was unconscious. Sometimes it all just got so bad.

I had money, my mom had money. So one night, right after school had ended after my last year of college, we left. We stayed in a hotel for a few days until we found an apartment.

My mom continued working at the hospital and I got a job at the school. Eventually I moved out and bought my own apartment. One day while I was teaching, I got a phone call. It was my mom. She was at the police station. I got a substitute and rushed down to see what had happened.

My dad had a co-worker. She was a single mom—only twenty-two years old. Her name was Karen Jackson. She wouldn't sleep with him. He beat her and he beat her and he _killed _her, Freddy. _He killed her_. He did it with Mike and Amanda tied to a chair _watching everything._ If a neighbor hadn't heard and called the police, he would've started in on them too.

My dad's in jail—most likely for life. My mom and I had to testify and so did Mike and Amanda.

They became orphans, at only four years old.

I had always wanted kids and I know I'm young and I always knew that adoption would be the only way I could ever get my own kids because I wasn't in a relationship and I'm not interested in women. Mike and Amanda needed a home, needed someone to love them. And I needed something in my life—I needed something to _love._ I wanted so badly to be there for them.

My dad was such a_fucking bastard_ for what he did to their mother and they're such sweet kids, they didn't deserve it. I couldn't let them get stuck somewhere and possibly have to go through what I went through with my dad as a kid. There was no way I was going to let anything happen to them again. I was able to adopt them and I love them so much, Freddy.

Mike is the sweetest kid in the whole world. He's always smiling and singing and he loves his sister more then anything in the world. Amanda's adorable. She's extremely smart and would do anything for Mike. She's shy though and she's still not completely over her mother's death.

The two of them are what kept me together this past year, Freddy, while I was missing you. Mike even reminds me of you. He's taken a liking to drums and he's just as hyper as you were when you were his age…"

Zack trailed off and I pulled him closer to me. Zack burrowed his head into my chest and I stroked his hair, in what I hoped was a soothing manner.

"Zack… I'm so sorry. I knew your dad was an asshole, but I never would have expected him to—to do something like this. And Mike and Amanda—for them to have to go through something like this… they couldn't have ended up with a better father though, Zack. You've done a great job with them already. I don't even know them yet but I adore them, and I can't wait to get to know them and spend time with them.

You haven't had an easy life, Zack and I know that you wont let Amanda and Zack anything less then the best. You're doing good, Zack."

"Freddy, I love you so much. I can't thank you enough for accepting. For understanding. For—for being _you._"

"I love you too, Zack, there's no reason to thank me."

I kissed his forehead and wiped away his tears.

"Go get the kids, Zack. I'm taking you guys out to dinner."

-----------

"Your idea of dinner is a happy meal at Mc Donald's?"

I grinned at Zack, "Who doesn't love the toys? And besides, what kid doesn't like eating chicken nuggets for dinner?"

Amanda glanced up at me shyly, "daddy buys chicken nuggets sometimes. The little dinosaur shaped ones. They taste best."

I smiled at Amanda; "my mom never bought chicken nuggets when I was a kid—not even the dinosaurs. We had to have a home cooked meal every night with the family."

"But," Mike protested, "You cook the dinosaurs in the oven, at home. That's home cooked!"

I laughed, "It's not quite the same thing. My mom always preferred slaving over a hot stove for hours on end to prepare a perfect meal instead and being able to simply just put some chicken nuggets in the oven or in the microwave. Honestly, I would've rather had the chicken nuggets."

Amanda pulled apart her chicken nugget and popped a piece into her mouth. "I like chicken."

Zack smiled at his daughter and poked her stomach, causing her to giggle. "Just because you like chicken, that doesn't excuse you two from having some milk and carrots."

Mike groaned.

I laughed, "Now Mike, young boys need their vitamins to grow up to be big and strong. You'll need a lot of strength and arm muscle if you want me to teach you how to drum…"

Mike's face lit up, "really? You drum? You'll teach me!?"

"Of course I will, as long as you eat you carrots and drink some milk."

"Daddy never drinks milk."

"Well that's because your daddy's lactose intolerant, which means he cant drink milk or even have some other dairy products like cheese and ice cream."

Amanda turned to me, "what about you? Are you ladder's tolerant too?

I laughed, "No, I'm not lactose intolerant. I drink milk when I have cereal and I have some every night before I go to bed."

Mike sighed, "I don't really like milk…but… I guess I'll drink it if it means I can drum!"

Zack chuckled and ruffled his son's hair. He smiled over at me, "You're really good with kids Freddy."

I smiled back and I knew.

I knew that this is where I wanted to be.

----------

**Author's Note: I hope you guys enjoyed having a longer chapter and I really hope you liked it. **

**I'm not lactose intolerant so I may not be correct in saying he cant have other dairy products besides milk, so I'm sorry if I'm wrong.**

**Dinosaur chicken nuggets **_**are**_** amazing.**

**Please review and tell me what you thought of chapter eight!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Note: Thanks so much for the reviews you guys!**

**Pretty much, I had no idea where I wanted to go with this story, and I sorta got an idea in my head and I'm just gonna run with it and see where it takes me.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Warning: Slash, a little bit of language, angst.**

----------

I had thought that it would be difficult for Mike and Amanda to accept me, considering their past, but they've really seemed to warm up to me, and I'm starting to love them like they're my own.

My mom was, of course, pleased that she was correct in assuming that all Zack needed was time, but she was also generally happy for the two of us and Mike and Amanda have her wrapped around their fingers.

I guess I never really expected things to turn out so well though. I didn't expect Zack to be so quick in accepting me into his life. I didn't expect his kids to like me. I guess I just never expected… _this._

After about a week, I moved in with Zack and things were better then I thought they ever could be. I took the kids to school and watched them after school while Zack was still at work. Then I would start dinner while Zack showered. After dinner, every night, I would teach Mike a little of the basics for drumming while Zack would take Amanda to her room and teach her some cords on the guitar, which, it turns out, she's a natural at.

I fell into this routine, and things were good.

Until _he_ came into our lives, and nothing was the same ever again.

----------

**Author's Note: Wow, I know that was short. I'm sorry! So, I'm not completely sure what's happening next so it may take a little while for the next chapter to come out. Please review and tell me what you thought. :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Authors' Note: Hey guys, I'm sorry for the wait. Thanks so much for your reviews though, guys, they really help me get chapters out faster then I normally would. I'm sorry the last chapter was so incredibly short, I made this one a bit longer for you guys, I hope you like it.**

**A little note, the language is a bit strong in this chapter, for a good reason. So, I apologize in advance in case it offends anyone.**

**Also, I started another Freddy/Zack story called 'Dreams Do Come True.' If you guys are interested. ;)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Don't sue me.**

**Warning: Slash between Freddy and Zack. Language, not too much. Angst, mentions of rape and abuse.**

**Enjoy Chapter Ten!**

"Do you think Stephen King realized he made all of his characters so gay?" Zack asked me as he turned off _Stand By Me_, "I mean, Chris and Gordie basically deserve the cutest couple ever award."

I laughed, "Yeah, and that look Chris gave Gordie at the end of the movie was _definitely_ cause for some questioning."

"And really, what twelve year old boys, other then us, actually ever acted like that around each other?"

"True. But we're special."

Zack grinned, "that's one way of looking at it."

I smiled at Zack and stuck my tongue out at him, "Yeah, love you too."

He kissed my cheek and sighed, "…I ran into someone today."

"Really? Who?"

"Dewey."

"_Shit._ _God fucking damn it_!"

"Yeah."

**(For some reason, the document won't let me insert the little break things in here that I normally use...)**

I haven't seen Dewey in five years. Five _fucking years. _And, just as soon as everything's good, and my life starts to look up, he's _back._

Dewey… I always new he was too good too be true. The way he came to us when we were ten and had nothing in life, the way he seemed like he was there for us, the way he cared about us.

Dewey never really cared about us though, not about the band, only about himself, about making it big. None of us wanted to believe it. We wanted to believe that Dewey cared about each and every one of us; what we thought, what we felt, what we believed, but he didn't. He never gave a damn about any of us.

He never cared about anything other then himself. He acted like he cared; he acted like we meant something to him. It was all just an act. A _fucking _act.

I really looked up to Dewey at first. He was always there for me, from when I was ten till when I was fifteen. He was everything I wanted to be when I grew up. He was _cool_. I wanted to be able to play a show, get drunk, stoned, and just have everything I ever wanted. I was stupid, just a stupid kid. A stupid kid with stupid pipe dreams.

After a while, I started to see Dewey for who he really was, a druggie, a liar, a bastard.

I should have realized it sooner; maybe then I could have prevented things from happening. I never really had anyone in my life other then my mom, and Zack. Dewey knew it, he took advantage of it, he made me hate him.

In the beginning I just thought Dewey wanted to be a father figure, something I never had. It was just wishful thinking, hoping someone could possibly care for me. I realized too late, that it was just an act.

The band wasn't together anymore, Dewey still hung around though. I never expected him to take advantage of me. I loved Dewey. He knew everything, he knew I loved Zack, he knew my dad hated me, he knew my only true friend was Zack, he knew I didn't trust anyone in life other then himself, my mom, and Zack. He fucking knew _everything._

I've never been so quick to trust someone before. Even now, I'm not quite sure why I trusted Dewey. I guess it was just one of those things, you think something's just too good to be true, you think something good is happening and you just want to hold onto it for as long as possible and never let it go.

I guess everything happens for a reason. There has to be a reason why Dewey started this whole thing. I started to distance myself from Dewey after five years or trusting him and looking up to him. I started thinking something was wrong with him, thinking he didn't really care for me. I didn't want to be around him anymore. He knew it. And, he wasn't happy.

I just never expected Dewey to corner me, to attack me, to _rape_ me, and then fucking _leave _and never leave even a trace of himself. I didn't want to believe that he would, that he even _could_, do such a thing. Zack helped me through it; he was the only one who even knew, who probably even cared.

Dewey got what he wanted. So why this? Why _now_?

**Author's Note: I hope you guys liked it, and I'll try to update as soon as possible!**

**Please review and tell me what you thought!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note: Thank you guys so much for the reviews, they always make me smile. :)**

**So the little dashes I use in the middle of chapters sometimes aren't showing up for some reason on here so instead I just have **_**-Break-**_** where I would normally have dashes.**

**Warning: This story contains slash, angst, and language.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own School of Rock or anything related to it. I also don't own the song from the first few chapters, which was Then I Did by Rascal Flatts.**

--

"Freddy, you can't keep sulking around. You're scaring Mike and especially Amanda. I know you're angry. I know you don't want to face this. But, Freddy, eventually you're going to have to."

I glared at Zack angrily, "you have no idea what I'm feeling. Why the fuck should I try facing it? Dewey's only here to ruin my life again—"

"Freddy," Zack cut in softly, "maybe Dewey's changed. I'm not saying that he has for sure. But maybe…"

"I can't fucking _believe_ this, Zack. You're taking Dewey's side?"

"Freddy—"

"Screw you, Zack. Just… screw you."

I shoved past Zack and out of the apartment.

**-Break-**

I wandered aimlessly for hours. I didn't know where to go or what to do. I just knew I needed to get out.

I didn't mean to be such a jerk to Zack. I love him more then anything and I hope I don't lose him over this. That's exactly what Dewey wants.

I smiled remembering the nightly drum lessons I would give Mike, the bedtime stories I would tell Amanda, the nights of passion Zack and I shared. I frowned and stopped walking, realizing, I may never have that again.

I looked around, I looked to the left, I looked to the right, and I realized. I have no idea where I am. I turned around, walked straight, took a left, a right, then another right, another left. I turned again, watching people go by, glaring down at me like I was nothing but worthless trash.

I turned, the rain began to fall. My hair stuck to my forehead in a tangle of knots. Raindrops mixed with tears and ran down my cheeks. My t-shirt soaked through and clung to my chest. My shoes filled with water and my soggy socks began to make my feet itch.

I turned, I walked blindly, swiping at my eyes, squinting into the distance.

I turned, left, right, straight. I turned again.

I didn't see the car. I didn't see the car until someone suddenly shoved me out of the way, onto the sidewalk.

My head cracked against the pavement and before I blacked out I heard the worried voice of the one I hoped to never see again.

**-Break-**

**Author's Note: I'm sorry for the short chapter but I hope you guys liked it. :) Please review and tell me what you thought!**

**Also, check out my new Zack/Freddy story called 'Dreams Do Come True'.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Note: Thanks so much for the reviews guys! So, I've been thinking… I really don't want this story to drag on forever, but I was thinking of maybe doing a sequel, like when the kids are all grown up and stuff, maybe from their point of view or something… what do you think?**

**Warning: Slash, language, angst, mentions of rape/abuse.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own School of Rock or anything in association with it.**

--

I woke up, head pounding, ankle throbbing.

I took a look around at my surroundings and was greeted by white walls, and an empty room.

I reached my hand up to massage my temple in an attempt to relieve myself of my headache, but found a thick bandage wrapped all the way around my head.

I tried to sit up and suddenly felt my head begin to spin. I closed my eyes and sighed.

Then I remembered.

--

I didn't want to believe that everything with Dewey could possibly be okay again. I didn't want to believe he changed. I didn't want him back in my life.

But he's back.

He saved my life; a car could've hit me. I could have died.

But I'm not ready to forgive.

--

"Freddy? I know I'm probably the last person that you want to see, but… are you okay? I was really worried."

I blinked back tears as I stared up at Dewey, "Why? Why—why are you back? Why did you do what you did? Just, _why_?"

Dewey looked away, "Freddy, I'm sorry about what I did to you, I'm—I'm sorry, okay? I've changed, I swear I have. I came back here to make things right with you. I'm so happy for you and Zack, I knew it would happen some day. I missed you a lot Freddy, you trusted me, and I betrayed that trust, I took advantage, and not a day has gone by where I haven't regretted it."

I didn't say anything. I didn't want to. I don't want to forgive him, no matter how sincere he sounds.

He sighed, and walked to the door, "I'm sorry Freddy… know that, okay? I called Zack, he should be here soon, he's worried."

He walked out and I let the tears fall.

--

**Author's Note: I know that was short, and I'm sorry! I hope you guys liked it though! I'll try to update soon! Please review! :)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's Note: Thanks so much for the reviews guys! So, I've been thinking… I really don't want this story to drag on forever, but I was thinking of maybe doing a sequel, like when the kids are all grown up and stuff, maybe from their point of view or something… what do you think?**

**Warning: Slash, angst, language, mentions of rape and abuse.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own School of Rock or anything related, or the song Then I Did which is by Rascal Flatts.**

--

I held Amanda close to me on the bed trying to convince her that I'm okay.

I wiped away her tears and placed a gentle kiss to her temple, "really, sweetie, I'm fine. Just a little concussion, and sprained ankle. I'll be good as new in no time."

Mike looked up, failing at his weak attempt to hide his tears, "you sure?"

I smiled and beckoned him over, "I'm sure."

Mike climbed onto his bed and took Amanda's hand in his, snuggling up next to her in the small, yet cozy hospital bed, her head on my chest and her small hand curled up and placed next to my face.

Finally reassured, the twins began to drift off.

The room was quiet, with the twins' soft and steady breathing and Mike's light snores.

Zack sighed and took the seat next to my bed, taking my hand in his.

"Are you really okay, Spazzy?"

"I'm fine Zack, really. And… I'm sorry about earlier, for yelling… and for storming out. Don't be mad, I don't want to lose you, lose the kids."

"It's okay, Freddy. I'm just glad that you're fine. I'm just glad Dewey was there to get you out of the way of the car. I'm glad I didn't lose _you._"

"I'm not going to forgive him, Zack."

"I know, Freddy," he kissed my cheek, "I wish you weren't so stubborn."

I smiled slightly, "It's part of my charm."

Zack kissed me lightly, "yeah, yeah."

I grinned and tugged him down onto the already crowded bed, resting my head on his chest.

Zack ran his fingers through my hair and kissed my forehead gently, under where the bandage ended.

"I love you, Freddy Jones."

I turned and placed my lips to his, entwining my hand with his, stoking his cheek with my free hand. I pulled away, and smiled, "and I love you, Zachary Mooneyham."

--

**Author's Note: Aww, Freddy and Zack make me smile.**

**I'll try to update soon! Please review!**

**Also, let me know what you think about the idea I was thinking of for a sequel that I mentioned earlier. :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**Author's Note: Okay, so I was inspired and updated again today, lol. Thanks for the reviews!**

**Oh, and Freddy's out of the hospital, this is like a week later. He's fine now, just experiencing headaches and such, his ankle is healed.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything, sadly.**

**Warning: Slash, language, angst, mentions of rape/abuse. You have been warned**

--

"Freddy?"

"Yeah, sweetie?"

"How come you and daddy sleep in the same room? I thought only mommy's and daddy's did that."

"Well, Mandy, your daddy and I are kind of like a mommy and daddy. We aren't married but we love each other very much, and we love you and Mike just like a mommy and daddy would. And… we sleep in the same room because… well, we love each other and sleeping in the same room is one of the big steps you take in a relationship, one you won't be taking until you're at least 38."

Amanda giggled, "so are you like our mommy then?"

I smiled and set Amanda down on my lap, "I guess you could say that."

Amanda grinned and nodded and gave my nose a kiss.

"Freddy?"

"Yeah, honey?"

"What's intercourse?"

I chuckled, "maybe you should ask your daddy about that one."

Amanda shrugged and ran off.

A minute later Zack came into the room with Amanda in his arms, "Freddy, what are you doing to my daughter?"

I grinned innocently, "nothing."

Zack glared playfully, "sure, Freddy, sure."

I smiled, "hey, Mandy? Why don't you go play with Mike in your room for a little bit while I talk to your daddy?"

Amanda nodded and took off around the corner.

I patted the spot on the sofa next to me and smiled at Zack.

Zack sat down and I leaned against him, his fingers massaging my shoulders gently.

I sighed, "I've been thinking about what Dewey said to me back in the hospital room, and he really sounded sincere. I think I'm ready to forgive him."

Zack smiled and planted a kiss in my hair, wrapping an arm around my waist and resting his chin atop my head, "I'm glad, Freddy. Make sure he knows, if he messes with you again, he has to go through me."

--

**Author's Note: Thanks for reading, and please review!**

**Again, let me know what you think about that sequel I mentioned last chapter!**

**Also updated today was my other Freddy/Zack fic, 'Dreams Do Come True,' read and review that as well as this!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews! You guys are amazing.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Warning: Slash, language, angst, mentions or rape and abuse.**

--

I sighed before I picked up the phone and dialed the number Zack had wordlessly written down and given to me before leaving the room.

"Hello?"

"Dewey? Uhm, it's Freddy… I wanted to—to talk…"

"Freddy? Uh, how are you doing? …I was really worried."

I Smiled, "I know. I'm doing better, just headaches now and then…. Uhm, look… Dewey, listen. I know you're sorry. I didn't want to forgive you, but… I believe you; I know you really mean it. I don't know why you did what you did. But, it was a long time ago, and… I think I might be ready to let it go. I'd like to be your friend again… if you'll let me?"

I could hear the smile in Dewey's voice, "Thank you, Freddy. This… it means so much. I love you; you know that, don't you? I always have. I got too close, Freddy, I couldn't handle it. I needed you to hate me so I could take off. I didn't _want_ you to hate me, Freddy, I didn't. I know it's no excuse, but I really am sorry. Truly sorry."

"I know… can we… just forget it? It's in the past now. And—and, Dewey? I missed you."

"I missed you too, Freddy, so much."

"I guess… I guess I'll be seeing you then."

"Bye Freddy."

"Bye Dewey," I whispered as the line went dead and I was left with the annoying dial tone in my ear.

I smiled a little to myself and went to the room that Zack and I shared, sure enough I found him there, tuning his guitar.

"Hey," I murmured softly.

Zack smiled in his adorable way, his hair flopping in front of his face, the smile tugging at the corner of his eyes, making them sparkle, "Hey yourself."

I kissed him softly and stroked his cheek.

"Thanks for putting up with me, Zack-attack."

"Someone has to do it, Spazzy."

I smiled and kissed his nose, "I love you."

Zack grinned and pulled me close to him, "And I love you. More then life itself."

We kissed deeply and I could feel the last of the puzzle pieces falling into place.

_You gotta go find those dreams  
Was the last thing that you said  
and then I did_

--

**Author's Note: Aw, yay, that was cute. So, I didn't really want Freddy to forgive Dewey, it just kinda happened, haha.**

**Ah, well, this is the end. I didn't want it to drag on and on with pointless nothingness happening. But, there will be a sequel coming soon. So, be on the lookout, put me on your alert list or something?**

**The last chapter of Dreams Do Come True was also posted today, so go read and review that if you like.**

**And, lastly, I have an idea for another Freddy/Zack story that I'll be trying to start soon. So, again, alert list maybe, if you're interested?**

**Thank you so much to all my lovely reviewers, I'm so glad you guys enjoyed this fic so much, keep on reading when the sequel comes out! You guys rock! :)**

**To end this obnoxiously long author's note… review!**


End file.
